Headlines from the Past Week:

Someone stole two of the screws out of my liciense plate and folded it in half

A lady hit my parked car and got pissed out me about it (she was backing up a one way street)

I had oil in my coolant tank and I payed to get that fixed and they broke the car more

I'm going to Flordia from December 17-22

The phillies are killing me; they need to stop losing in the 9th

I now have two jobs at school

I have two science tests this week and I don't understand any of it

I've been sending at least one care package a week to my dad and the shipping costs are killing me (I sent 3 boxes this week)

There was a huge fight on my street last night over beer and Aides? 

I've been really sick and can't get better

People that study all the time make me nervous and feel like a slacker

My teacher volenteered me and two other people to write a 10 page paper and give a presentation at Cabrini Day

I told her I didn't have any time to do it and she told me I needed to make time

I have a group project due Monday and my one group member has all the stuff and want give it to me to work on the presentation nor will she work on the presentation 
(I hate assigned groups) 



P.S. Grey's Anatomy is back in less than a week!!!!!!!!!!!!

I spent the day yesterday at my dad's base. In the morning, I had to get a new id card because mine expired. The guy that made it was really cool. He let me keep all of my old info (i.e. weight). He put that I weighed 115 pounds lol. I wish!!!  After that I sat in my dad's office and observed his troops.  Most of the people in his unit are around my age (and most are extremely hot).  Yesterday was my dad's last day at the base until April.  He got issued all of his gear and was breifed on his duties for the next eight months. This is when it truely sank in that he was actually going to Iraq.  I huge part of being in the military is trusting your unit to have your back; one of the guys in my dad'd unit (his name is Collins) scares in this sense. He kept losing his gear, getting yelled at for act retarded, and just being stupid.  I do not trust him to have my dad and the rest of the unit's (who I have become very close with over the years) backs. 

Today was me and my dad'd chance to spend some time together free from work.  By noon, I came to the conclusion that he should have just went to work.  We would start to do something and the phone would ring. One of the calls was to tell my dad that one of his men had gone missing and was nowhere to be found. Yeah, you probably can guess it is Collins. I have no idea how this kid got into the military. Don't they have to take a test or something?  

Tonight my whole family (mom, dad, me, Colleen, grandparents, aunts, uncles) went to dinner at Erin's Pub as a send off for my dad.  It was a nice time.  Everyone with the exception of myself was crying. Everyone keeps telling me how I have to be brave, not cry, and take on more responsibility. I can't be brave anymore!  I just want to cry!  The topper was when my dad gave me an envelope.  Inside was his will, my mom's power of attorny, and other things that we would need if something were to happen to him. He thought that if anything were to happen, my mom would be too worked up to remember where the paperwork was. I was not expecting such paperwork to be in the envelope.  I can't even bring myself to think of needed those papers. 

Tomorrow we are going to pack all the bags. I don't think that i'll be able to help/ watch. It hurts so bad. I wish that people could understand what i'm going though. Even if they could never understand, i just need to be held and hugged. Why is it that hugs always make people feel better?     


Sunday is Meghan's annual party; I can't wait to see everyone again.  I hope that a night out will help ease my mind at least temporarily.



I'm just trying to be a father,
Raise a daughter and a son,
Be a lover to their mother,
Everything to everyone.
Up and at 'em bright and early,
I'm all business in my suit,
Yeah, I'm dressed for success from my head down to my boots,
I don't do it for money, there's still bills that I can't pay,
I don't do it for the glory, I just do it anyway,
Providing for our future's my responsibility,
Yeah I'm real good under pressure, being all that I can be,
And I can't call in sick on Mondays when the weekends been to strong,
I just work straight through the holidays,
And sometimes all night long.
You can bet that I stand ready when the wolf growls at the door,
Hey, I'm solid, hey I'm steady, hey I'm true down to the core,
And I will always do my duty, no matter what the price,
I've counted up the cost, I know the sacrafice,
Oh, and I don't want to die for you,
But if dyin's asked of me,
I'll bear that cross with an honor,
'Cause freedom don't come free.
I'm an american soldier, an american,
Beside my brothers and my sisters I will proudly take a stand,
When liberty's in jeopardy I will always do what's right,
I'm out here on the front lines, sleep in peace tonight.
American soldier, I'm an American,
An American,
An American Soldier

I went to the zoo today. It was fun. I liked the elephants and monkeys.

I'm one sexy monkey lol 




I'm going to Atlantic City tomorrow to celebrate my best friend's birthday. I'm going to get to work on my tan lol. 
Other people probably wouldn't consider me tan, but for me i'm dark lol. 

"Your too fat"

"Your not smart enough"

"You used to be so skinny"

"You will be a horrible nurse"

"I can't wait until you go back to school so I don't have to look at you"

"Your friends are so much prettier and skinnier than you"

"How come ... has a boyfriend and you don't"

"Why did you let yourself gain weight"

"All you do is eat"

"Colleen is so much better at sports than you"

"Guys don't like fat girls"

"You will never amount to anything"

"You used to be pretty, but not anymore"

"I hate the way you dress"

"Your foot probably broke because it can hold all of your weight"

"You shouldn't go to the beach or the pool in a bathing suit; people will be grossed out"

"I don't know why your friends like you"



Why can't you just love me for me? Is it really that much to ask for?

 

Yesterday was so hard. It have been one year since Danielle's death.  A year ago, everyone said that the pain would go away; they lied. Not a day has gone by the I haven't thought about her; everywhere I go there is something that reminds me of her.   I keep reading the paper about other people dying the same way; I wish that they could see the pain that it causes.  Know the pain may not even make a difference but there is always a chance. 




0CT0BER 22,1985 - JULY 15,2005




I guess, in the words of Billy Joel, Only the good die young.

Ryan Howard just won the All Star Home Run Derby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   This is the second straight year that a member of the Phillies has won the home run derby. I'm hardcore excited. 



p.s. The All Star game is tomorrow....Don't forget to watch my future husband, Chase Utley, play. I voted EVERYDAY so that he could be the starting second basemen for the National League. 

I went to the Phillies game yesterday. I went with my family; I'm trying to spend as much time as possible with my dad. 

Upside as the game:



Chase Utley's fine fine ass



Downside of the game:



My REALLY burnt legs


p.s. The Phillies WON for a change!!!!!!!!!!!!!

10 commandments of a college student

Student was searching for divine inspiration. Student walked high on the mountain of knowledge and came across God. Student asked God how to live life as a college kid should. And God said unto him, follow these Ten Commandments and you shall be all a college kid is. And Student thanked God and it was good. And Student spread the Ten Commandments of College to all.

I- Thou Shalt Nap
And God gave unto Student a great gift, the gift of napping. God said to him, You shall spend half your day napping. You shall nap in class, in your room and in your friends room. And God said, if you dont nap, you will not be able to stay up all night drinking. And Student said, Nap I shall, and it was good.

II- Thou Shalt Get Sick All the Time
Now God said to Student, you must be sick all of the time. And student said why. And God said unto him, you shall share drinks, stay up too late, drink too much and make out with people you dont know. Therefore, God said, you shall be sick all year round. But God said, blessed are the sick for they have partied the hardest. And it was good.

III- Thou Shalt Write Witty Away Messages
Student asked, but God, how will I show everyone that I am funny? And God said unto him, thou shall write witty away messages. God said to student, you shall never just say you are in the shower, you shall say you are getting wet and wildin the shower. You shall never say you are at class, you shall say you are sleepingin class. God said, if you do not write witty away messages, I shall smite you. Blessed are the funny, for they will get many girls to be their friends but never hook up with them. And it was good.

IV- Thou Shalt Wear a Hoodie
And then Student asked God, God how do I look like a college kid. And God said unto student, you must wear a hoodie, for it is a useful garment. And you shall never wash it either. Student asked God what kind of Hoodie should it be and God said, you shall own one with your schools logo on it and you shall own many others of varying colors and creeds. And Student was pleased and God was pleased.

V- Thou Shalt Shit a Lot
And Student asked of his bathroom habit and God told him, Student, you shall eat in the Cafeteria and you shall shit a lot. And it will not be good shit, it will be the shit of the devil for your ass shall burn for hours. Your school shall put laxatives in their food and you shall feel their pain. And Student began to weep, and God said unto him, Student, fear not the shit, for all your fellow students will be experiencing the same. And Student dried his eyes and thanked God and God told him to use wet naps to ease the pain.

VI- Thou Shalt Eat EasyMac
Student asked unto God if there was any alternatives to the cafeteria, and God said to him, you shall eat a lot of EasyMac. It is easy to make and you dont need milk or a stove. And student said microwaves were forbidden by the RA. And God said to him, you shall hide the microwave under your bed with a towel on top. And Student asked, what if it is discovered. And God told him to stop being such a pussy, and it was good.

VII- Thou Shalt Hook Up
Student then asked of sex. And God said, Student, you shall hook up and be happy. You shall go home with random people every weekend and forget about them the next day. You shall see them at class and be awkward amongst their company. You shall exchange saliva at bars and parties and it will be good. And Student became gleeful and God told Student to wrap it up because He knows where she has been, but Student does not.

VIII- Thou Shalt Join a Club and Never Go to Meetings
Student inquired of his spare time and God reminded him that he should be napping. But Student said he wanted to do other things. So God said unto him, you shall join a club at the beginning of the semester, but then never go to meetings. And Student asked why he should not go to meetings, and God told him, because the glee club is gay. And Student understood His wisdom.

IX- Thou Shalt Wake Up Confused
God said to Student, there will come many a day when you shall wake up in the bed of another and not know where you are. You will not remember what you did last night and you shall be confused. You will see that you have nipple rings and a tattoo now and are covered in Sharpie. And Student was disturbed by this, but God said, you shall tell great stories about it to your friends someday. And Student understood and God took a sip of a beer.

And God gave Student the final Commandment

X- Thou Shalt Gain Weight
And Student wished to hear the final commandment and God said he would not like it. But Student insisted, so God said unto him, you shall gain weight. However, God said, you will not buy new clothes, so you will wear sweat pants a lot. God said, Student, you will watch a lot of TV and become fat to which Student wept profusely. But God comforted Student saying, you will still get ass even if you cannot tie your shoes anymore. Student felt better and God pointed to Students chest saying, those will soon be bitch tits. And it was good.

This is the word of God, follow the Ten Commandments of College or you will be smoke 


I <3 the 5th commandment lol

This summer has been boring thus far.  The only this that I have done that is fun and exciting is go to Phillies games. Every game that I have gone to, they have lost. I'm going tonight. They REALLY need to win tonight to keep up with the Mets.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it doesn't rain.  They are giving out bobble heads of my future husband lol (Chase Utley) tonight.  

I miss all my Cabrini friends already.  I've talked to several of them, but that doesn't make me miss them any less.  The other night I talked to Emily for over 2 hours about the Phillies and life at Cabrini.  I'm going to have to make my way to New Jersey to see her.  I've also talked to Caitlin alot lol.  I don't know how I can live without seeing her 5,000 times a day lol. She makes my life. 

Tomorrow, I have a family party because my aunt and uncle are moving to Mertyle Beach on Sunday.  I may drive down to Mertyle Beach to help them move/ go to the beach.  

I need to really start exercising again.  College have killed my body lol.  I gain way more weight than I thought that I would.  My goal for the summer is to lose I the weight that I've gained plus some.  

Growing up, I was on a softball team with the same people every year.  Even during the off season we were all inseperable, but over the years some of my teams move and we sorta last touch.  During my junior year of high school, two of my teammates come out and told me that she was a lesbian.  This didn't matter to me; whatever makes them happy.  That summer, my former best friend and teammate also come out.  Yet again, what ever makes her happy.  Well yesterday, this former best friend who I sorta lost touch with in the past couple of years told me that she had a new girlfriend and how she thinks that she is in love.  Then she tells me that her girlfriend is one of our other teammates that I didn't know was gay.  I was telling one of my current friends about it and she made a comment that I never saw coming.  I'm not going to go into exactly what she said but it was a shot not only a gays but at my whole team.  I was so shocked and affended; I didn't even how to respond.  How can people be so ignorent? I guess she figured that because I am straight I would be ok with her cooments, but that was so wrong no matter who you say it to!        

I feel like crap. I hate being sick.

I'm soo stressed out.  My parents were to Hawaii (my mom was vacationing; my dad was working) without me. My mom fell while she was there and broke her arm/ shoulder. she can't do anything for herself. They came home early (which suprised me that my dad could come home early too). My dad has taken off for awhile to take care of my mom. My mom is getting surgery on Monday to put in screws to stabalize her shoulder and arm injury. In the middle of the week I came home from school to give my dad a brake. When I got home I was shocked to see that my dad wasn't there. While my parents were away, my dad went to the "doggy resort". I was told that the dad that they came home that my dad would go get Kelly. When my dad went to get her, they said that they had to place her in the animal hospital days earlier. When you check a pet into the resort they ask for emergency contact info in case anything happens; they NEVER called. They refused to let my dad take the dog or even explain what had happened to her. All they said was that she had liver damage and had lumps under her two front armpits.  She finally got to come home Thursday night. She had been shaved, had six drains inserted to drain fluid from her armpits, and a "lamp shade helmet". The drains made such a mess. When I saw her I noticed a large gash on her back paw. Today she had an appointment to get the drains removed and they put a cast on her back paw to protect the gash and help it heal. But her is the catch to the whole story...the only thing that they are charging me for is her medication.  They still have not explained to us what exactly happened to my dog. I need to know what they did to her.